Good Luck Masturbating....

Okay, I know how weird it sounds but it's true. Everyone needs a little self love now and again. There will be nights when even the horniest husband will have a headache, or fake a headache and then mysteriously be well enough to watch the football game, it's just bound to happen. About a month into married life I learned a little lesson about privacy, the hard way... I walked home from the gym feel unstoppable. Needless to say by the time I got home I had a plan. I slinked into the living room, slowly peeling off my yoga pants, you know the deal the whole "strip tease, you, me bedroom now" thing, only to be met with, "hunny your sexy but I'm just so tired tonight." Defeated, I put on my best pouty face, collected my clothes and stomped naked through the house and into our bedroom. After contemplating the outcome I did what any self respecting in-the-mood-but-not-getting-any woman would do, pulled out my vibrator and shut off the lights. Now, if I were still living alone this would have lead to a happy ending and a good night's sleep, not so much when your bedroom isn't just your bedroom. Mid "me time" I hear "baby, are you still awake?" I immediately twisted the vibrator to off and laid perfectly still pretending to be asleep. My loving husband belly flopped onto the bed to put his arms around me, which of course turned on the vibrator. Breaking the silence was a very distinct buzzing noise, "hunny?"I couldn't help it, I bursted out laughing and had to fess up to the whole thing. Of course my husband thought it was hysterical and still teases me about it, but still. I guess my advice would be to wait till your husband isn't home before having your "me time".